would I have understood?

pg. 8 - ..."But would we have understood what was really happening?"...  this sentence struck me this morning as I was reading the preface.  I continued reading but it came to mind again... would I have understood what was going on?  Would I have taken a moment to slow down, smell, hear, feel what was happening?  I want to put myself in the place of imagining all that He went through for me.  I want to read it, "stick my eyes in my ears", but at the same time I don't really want to be reminded, because it is easier not to.  It is easier not to face it - to stay focused in my busyness and not to understand what was really happening.  What was done at the cross was done for me... it was done for all of us at Elliot... and for every student in our mentor group..."everything that needs to be done is done."  I pray that as mentors we can share our struggles and model a lifestyle for these students that shows the grace and the power of Christ right through those weaknesses and struggles - that we may we live, fully aware of what was done for us and understand what was really happening.